If you’d asked me 20 years ago where I’d be living today, I would have confidently said California. At the time, it was home, and I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. And yet, here I am, firmly rooted in Minnesota—a place that, back then, didn’t even seem like an option.
It’s not just my location that has changed. Two decades ago, I was deeply immersed in technical sales, driven by logic and problem-solving. The idea that I’d one day become a therapist and coach would have sounded absurd. Engineer, sales guy, therapist, coach—on the surface, it all seemed disconnected. But looking back, I see a common thread: a pursuit of meaning and a desire to connect with something essential.
Life rarely unfolds according to plan.
That’s not a failure—it’s the nature of growth. We build a roadmap based on what we know, but the real journey often takes us into unexpected territory. The plans we made give us a sense of control and security but then we meet people, encounter challenges, and discover aspects of ourselves that change our trajectory.
If you’ve seen The Karate Kid, you’ll remember that Daniel Caruso starts out simply wanting to defend himself from bullies. But his training with Mr. Miyagi becomes about so much more—discipline, patience, and inner strength. His life takes a direction he never anticipated, but by the end, he’s exactly where he’s meant to be.
This is the paradox we all face. We can look around and say, “I never thought my life would look like this,” while also recognizing, “This is exactly where I need to be.”
So how do we embrace this uncertainty?
Here are a few ways to try it on for yourself:
- Notice Where Life Has Surprised You – Think back to a time when things didn’t go as planned, but in hindsight, turned out better or more meaningful than you expected. What did you gain from that detour?
- Loosen Your Grip on ‘Should’ – We often hold onto rigid expectations of how life “should” be. Try shifting your focus from controlling outcomes to being open to what unfolds.
- Trust the Pull Toward Meaning – Pay attention to what energizes you, what you’re drawn to, even if it doesn’t seem to fit your original plan. Often, those instincts are guiding you toward something essential.
- Stay Curious – Instead of resisting change, get curious about it. Ask yourself, “What if this is leading me somewhere important?”
Life’s most meaningful paths are rarely predictable. The challenge—and the gift—is learning to trust the journey as it unfolds.
