“Sensitivity is a superpower. It allows you to see what others can’t, feel what others avoid, and understand with a depth that is rare.” – Marc David
One of the most surprising discoveries in my own midlife journey has been understanding my sensitivity—not as a flaw or something to be hidden but as a source of depth and connection. Sensitivity, I’ve come to realize, can be an asset, especially when viewed not as fragility but as a finely tuned perception that offers insight into ourselves and others.
Elaine Aron, author of The Highly Sensitive Person, describes sensitivity as a trait that affects how deeply we process our environment and experiences. For men, acknowledging this trait can feel vulnerable, even uncomfortable. Sensitivity, however, need not be a label that implies weakness. Instead, it can be a sophisticated tool—like the Hubble telescope—that lets us see beneath the surface and access parts of life others might miss.
In my work with men at midlife, I see how this trait, often latent or unrecognized, can emerge in new ways. Midlife, as William Bridges writes in Transitions, is a time of “letting go of the old and making way for the new.” In many ways, this process of transition may open a door for sensitivity to step forward. We often find ourselves more aware of others’ emotions, more attuned to subtle relational dynamics, and more reflective about what we truly value. The heightened sensitivity we may feel isn’t about being “soft”; it’s about having an instrument finely calibrated to the experiences and relationships that matter most.
This sensitivity is often interpersonal and intrapersonal, allowing us to connect more meaningfully with others and ourselves. John O’Donohue, the Irish poet and philosopher, spoke of sensitivity as a gift that allows us to “see beauty where others see none” and “to recognize depth where others pass by.” Sensitivity, then, can serve as a compass guiding us to richer relationships and a clearer sense of purpose—a quality to embrace, not a weakness to mask.
For men who might hesitate to own this part of themselves, I offer a gentle question: What if this heightened awareness, this sensitivity to others and to life itself, were not something to suppress but rather to understand and value? What if it could lead you closer to the person those around you truly need?
In embracing my own sensitivity, I’ve found a new level of connection, not just with others but with a deeper, quieter part of myself that had been muted by years of striving. If this resonates, perhaps this is a season to explore rather than resist your own sensitivity and see where it might lead. Sensitivity is not the enemy; it may be one of our greatest allies in midlife, illuminating paths we might otherwise miss.
If you’ve ever wondered about your own sensitivity or how it might be guiding you, let’s talk. Together, we can explore what this quality has to offer and how it might support the life and relationships you’re building.
Sign up to receive weekly insights like these straight to in your inbox.
